Thursday 15 September 2016

Challenging Pre-Exam Fear

(Source: http://weheartit.com/entry/group/95921329)

Welcome to a new post!

This one is on more of a serious note, even if I am currently lying in my garden at 30° with my brand new baby aka laptop.

As you know I am soon to finish my driving license, if everything goes well, and I cannot even tell you how anxious that makes me feel. I've never been a big fan of exam etc where in the end I'll be either told by someone that I failed or did well, or I will let myself decide whether I did well or not. I hate this situation, and it always makes me feel quite anxious, thinking that someone is currently trying to test you. I feel like I am being judged, and I hate that feeling, even though in normal life I have learnt to deal quite a lot  better with it, especially in school. 

Before every driving lesson, especially when I had had a few hours without having to sit in school before it, I always get really stressy, panicky and I get a feeling in my tummy as if I'm about to become president of the United States or do bungee jumping. I literally have to force myself to  shut off, watch a calming video by the Michalaks and whilst I do that read through motivational quotes. If I wouldn't want it to be over so quickly, it would've literally taken me years to do it, as I would've blown off so many lessons because of it.

It's terrible, but I am pretty sure that I am not the only one that sometimes feels like this, which is kind of the reason why I am doing this post right now. I feel like we don't talk enough about pre-exam anxiety, or whatever you might want to call it.

What has definitely helped me, is writing myself a little note on a bright paper, with a few motivational sentences, and some smileys and hearts decorating it. I even did that the day before I went back to school to give myself some motivation to think positively about going back there in some way. In that way when I get up in the morning and I sit down to do my make-up, my first look goes onto that paper, and I tell myself to read it carefully and take it in, even though I know exactly what it's saying.

Quick 10 minute naps and meditation as well as yoga are another helpful factor. I don't do these ones as often, as I am  not always in the mood for them, but they are an amazing way to shut off for a few minutes, not care about what's going to happen and just relax.

Finding a little note from my mum when I come down for breakfast or when I open my lunch, were always things that gave me a little boost as well, before I did my theory exam for my driving license for example. Tell someone, a friend for example, about how anxious you feel about that situation, someone that will understand you, and not make you feel worse about yourself than you already are. I often have conversations with friends before the driving lessons that I feel pretty anxious and unmotivated about, and they always spam me with messages, trying to think positively, and getting me into a better mind set. I often remember and listen to their words in my head while I drive, to keep my confidence up.

This literally feels like a little therapy to my future self, who will try to pass her driving license this week. Let's hope I actually make it, but as of right now I am actually trying to think positively.

What I also think is quite helpful is having a little pamper session whilst watching a really nice film or series the night before, to stop myself from overthinking everything that could possibly go wrong, but also probably won't.

I also love being as prepared as possible, because in that way I know I did everything that I could, instead of leaving it up to higher powers. Even for my driving tests I wrote down a list on my computer including all the things that I wanted to make sure to quickly be able to go through again before I take my test. Especially for upcoming tests I am also spreading some lovely quotes throughout the paper, to get that motivational smile on that sad and anxious face.

As you can tell, I bloody love quotes, but I feel like they are just the best way to motivate yourself to do something and make you remember, that you aren't the only person that has these problems.

What all of us also need to remember is, that none of us is perfect. We hate failure, we all do, that's why we're human. But the thing is, life isn't always great, and sometimes we need a little failure before we can bloom again. There's a reason why my favourite quote is called

' Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning how to dance in the rain.'

But the thing is, as long as you did your best, you need to remind yourself of that, even if you fail. You did your best not to do so, but life just got in the way, and wanted you to have this lesson and not be successfull this one time. Just because you MIGHT fail once, doesn't mean your whole life is a fail. There wouldn't be rainbows, without a little rain at first. Remember to think positively. If it goes wrong, you get another chance to make it better. If you are successfull, even better, you will be able to celebrate. Don't bring yourself down.

I keep saying that I definitely won't go to school afterwards, if I fail, even if I know I can do it. We need to stop making ourselves sound worse than we are, even us perfectionists.

Rewards are also a way to motivate yourself in my opinion. Set yourself a goal, and a reward if you achieve that goal. Keep that goal and reward in mind whenever you worry. I, for example, am going to go shopping and treat myself to some of the brand new NYX and Sleek products that only just arrived in German drugstores, and that I want to try and blog about quite badly.

And if I fail, I'll get myself some funny One Direction videos on my laptop whilst drinking a hot chocolate, eating Sour Cream & Onion flavoured peanuts and being all cozy in my big hoodie in bed - maybe reading a few thousand quotes more. By the way, especially We Heart It is incredible for bloody lovely pictures and quotes! ( I might have mentioned that quite a few times on my blog so far, but oh well. )

This post definitely didn't turn out to be as long as I would have wanted to, but that's alright. As Hannah Montana once sang - "Nobody's perfect". At least I got my thoughts of my chest, that little stone trying to tear me down into a sad bowl  of worries, and that was all I wanted and needed.

I really hope this post wasn't just bloody boring, but actually helped some of you as well, as it really came from the bottom of my heart. This is the kind of post, I would always tell anyone to blog about. When you feel like you need to  get something off of your chest, but you don't want to talk about it, or instead you prefer writing about it - write it down, click publish without editing it, and let people feel with you and help inspire them as well at the same time.

Sorry if this was all a little blurred, contains thousands of mistakes and isn't in any correct order, but oh well that's life and a speaking heart (wow why so poetic today?)

I'm not going to bother you with questions right now, instead I would like you to just sit down quietly and in peace for a few minutes, and remember what I just said, and why you are able to achieve anything, if you want to.



I hope you have a wonderful day ♥


Love, Jacqueline Xx



(P.S. I do not claim any copyright for the picture. All rights go to its owner. I am not using this picture to gain money, but for inspiration and fun purely.)

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